Thursday, July 15, 2010

Feeling Frustrated...

So, I mentioned my friend that I met last week, and how he only speaks spanish.... Well after spending some time with him and practicing my spanish more and more, I'm just feeling really overwhelmed with the language. I don't feel like I'm getting any better, and I wish, I wish, I wish, that I could communicate more effectively in Spanish. I never realized how disabled I would feel to not be able to speak the language. I never realized how much I crave dialogue as a form of intimacy until now. Not that I want to be so involved in this boys life forever, I just like to know where people come from and what makes them who they are. I love the process of learning who someone is by hearing their stories about their parents, siblings, friends, co-workers, and teachers... I am especially curious about learning about this boys life because of the cultural difference. I'm fascinated and intrigued by his behavior and mannerisms compared to that of the men I have met/dated in the states.

Alas, the girls have all reassured me that my spanish has gotten, but I am by no means approaching fluency. Reading and writing Spanish are getting easier... but I feel very nervous about speaking. I know I'm going to make mistakes, but I second guess myself too much. Hopefully, somewhere I can muster up the confidence to drastically improve my skills.

On an up note though, today I presented the first draft of my workshop manuel to my professor and supervisor. It went REALLY well!! I'm super excited about. Monica (my supervisor) expressed a lot of appreciation for the work I was putting to creating this workshop. Right now I have the manuel broken up into 4 main groups- Decision Making, Self Esteem, Diversity, and Sexual Health. Under each area I have created and adapted key points to touch on, discussion questions, and activities. Like I mentioned before, I'm really enjoying this part of Social Work, and wouldn't mind implementing this into my future career.

For this weekend, we are packing up and heading out to the beach again!!! I'm sooooooooo (x a million) excited. It has been so rainy and chilly here this past week, it's been kind of depressing. We are going to Puerto Viejo, leaving San Jose at 4 pm Friday. We wont get to the beach till late, but we aren't coming back until monday, so we will have all of saturday and sunday!! Puerto Viejo is on the Caribbean side of the country, so I'll let you know what I think of it. I've heard that the Caribbean side is nicer so I'm definitely feeling that.

Hope all is well on the home front!! I love and miss you all!!!

-A

5 comments:

  1. your manual sounds interesting, will you be able to bring a english copy home? Who will be using these manuals when its completed?
    the beach trip sounds like it will be fun and beautiful, anything with the word caribbean in sounds like it must be experienced. have a fun and relaxing weekend:)

    ReplyDelete
  2. Have fun this weekend!!!! Take lots of pictures (of course) and I can't wait to see them!!! I love you!

    ReplyDelete
  3. Congrats on the great feedback on the manual. That part of your work sounds really interesting and fun. Good luck with the language. It sounds like it's getting better and better all the time.

    ReplyDelete
  4. I always ask how your work is going and you don't often get into too much depth so I'm happy to hear about the results. I'm relieved for you that it's all finished! and I'm extra happy that the presentation went so well too :)

    I'm sorry to hear about the language barrier. That seems soo so frustrating, I can't even imagine it actually. But you've got a whole month more to go! You've learned so much already, and it can only get better! And you should keep it up in the states with daddy and stuff. Well, i LOOVE you, I can't wait to see pics from this weekend either. :)

    ReplyDelete
  5. Whats up sis! how was the trip to the beach? I finally have a computer again so i can get caught up on all your adventures. Sounds like you are having a blast. I cant believe there are only a few weeks left! have fun and maybe we'll get to see you soon!

    ReplyDelete